Episode 2-“TiVo is for Rich People”

Last night I had church practice.  Somewhere along the line, I apparently volunteered to spearhead some sort of Praise Group at our church .  Now, I don’t really know why, but I have a particular problem with most Christian ‘Rock’ or ‘Pop’ or whatever you hear on the radio.  It’s just that it’s not really good.  I like good music.  (although my Ace of Base CD may contradict this particular statement, according to some…….some morons!)  Blah blah blah, so the point is, we try to play good Christian music, like old school hymns set to new themes, chords, and beats and stuff.  Close your eyes (after reading the whole sentence, huh?) and imagine “Amazing Grace” to a calypso beat, like one you’d push on an old keyboard that does neat sounds like human voice and pan pipes .  Neat huh?  Oh, you’re bored?  okay, me too.  Onward Christian Soldiers…..

The real problem is that American Idol was on.  Yes, I heart reality TV, particularly Idol.  Especially when they have themes where Stevie Wonder has to come and pretend that he gives 2 shits about these half-wits who are all going to butcher his genious, shortly after claiming that “meeting Mr. Wonder was the greatest musical experience of my life.”  Like they even know.  Blech.  I love it.  Followed by obligatory joke about Stevie not seeing something.  Ha ha.  It’s funny because he’s blind.  Although, after hearing these guys, I think he’d rather go all Helen Keller because hearing the whole thing is pretty gnarly. 

Which is why I love it.  So I was going to tape it.  I started the VCR a running at 7 o’clock, and then fidgeted with the cord so that we could see better through the TV….you see, we can’t afford cable, so we just plug it in, and the cord that runs through our back yard kind of acts like a make shift antenna and we can pick up different channels depending on how you jiggle.  It’s a science that we’re proud to have mastered.  Great, it’s working.  I leave for church.

I return, get the tape ready, and to my frustration, I realize that I successfully taped the first 2 minutes of the damn show.  2 damn minutes.  You see, VCR’s, (you know, the things they used on the  Flintstones ) have something I call the ‘bastard button’.  It’s where it changes the tape inside it to a device that can successfully record like 45 minutes of program.  If you know to change it, it goes for 6 hours, but the trick is, and this is where those bastards get you, and I hope you all heed this arcane warning…..IT CHANGES BY ITSELF!!! [cue lights, ominous music] So, because I had decided to save my taped Apprentice episode (I love Donald Trump btw, ever since he did SNL which was damn hilarious) I only got to watch about 45 seconds of Ass Young suck it up royally in front of millions of people.  Damn it!  So I went to bed.  Damn the man.  I’m not going to buy a huge cable/TiVo set up just so I can screw up taping my shows…I can do it now for free.   

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Published in: on 15 March 2006 at 3*51 pm  Comments (1)  

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One CommentLeave a comment

  1. On the plus side, you only have to come a mile and a half to see your Outrageous TV Moments that are all saved on our TiVo.

    I think you may feel about the VCR the way I feel about vacuums.


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