Ass, ass, and more ass.

     *****

Screw you, Michael X. of 99ish S. Something street, Chicago, IL!  Screw you and your damn note leaving!  If I want to legally park my legally registered car on a PUBLIC street, then that’s my damn right, asshole.  That’s why I pay taxes.  You don’t OWN the street, just because you’re a firefighter who gave money to Dan Hynes for Democratic Comptroller. (info grace a Google) Screw you in your uptight ass.  AND, the next time you think it’s an ‘inconvenience’ to have a car in ‘your’ spot on the street (MIND YOU, WHEN YOU HAVE A LONG DRIVEWAY AND 2 CAR GARAGE RIGHT THERE, D-BAG), think about what an inconvenience it would be to have the cop that you complained to show up at someone’s house at 9 in the morning to tell your wife who is home alone with the baby and thought that you had been killed in some gruesome crash and here he was with the bad news, but no, that there has been a complaint that, and quote “your legally registered car is legally parked” somewhere, and can you move it when you get a chance?  Think about that asshole!  By the way, my friend, everytime I drive ANYWHERE near your house, I plan on parking in “my new spot.”  Take it.

     *****

sorry to you non-chicago people….just skip to the next one…WHOA, Peraica/Stroger, let’s take it a little easy here.  Let’s all just calm down and see if we can’t make it look like voting actually works.  Come one now, maybe a little patience from everyone would be fine.  But, you know what would be even finer?—If Todd Stroger, that little piece of shit would just frieking leave or something.   I don’t know if your little cronies are out searching around the public domain anymore, now that you’ve thrown the election, d-bag, but I want you to hear this.  You don’t deserve the office.  You will most likely screw everything up.  I’m not convinced that you even know what you’re running for based on the stuff you attacked Peraica for.  Do you realize that as Cook County Board President that you have very little to do with abortion?  Do you?  What?  I can’t hear through your stupid lisp.  P.S.—watch it Obama…I was starting to like you until you endorsed this ass.

     *****

Britney!  Nice Job!  Just when I thought maybe you two weirdos had something going!  And just in time with the two infants, too.  Nicely done.  I’m sure those kids will grow up completely well adjusted and not in need of any sort of counseling.  Or parole.  Hey, BS?  Can you please re-release E-Mail My Heart?  I miss that song….

     *****

Hey, Bitch at 99th street Metra Station…Why would my wife need to explain her whole process to you if she needed her ticket stamped female?  She needed it to say male because she was, wait for it, buying it for someone else.  Surprise!  Why would she tell you all this stuff if she just needed it stamped “female”?  She is a female.  BUT, if you DID screw it up like you did so much, you Lexus-driving-i-got-this-job-because-someone-owed-someone-a-favour ass, don’t accuse her of screwing it up.  Last time I checked, SHE was the customer, and YOU were the ho.

     *****

Way to go, George.  You pissed everyone off so much that the house and senate are completely Democratic.  Great.  Now I have to effing deal with hearing about Nancy Pelosi.  Yuck.  Then again, like Hastert was any better.  Tough to choose between nasty bitches and pedophiles, huh?

     *****

I need a Pina Colada.  Stat.  Only, without the coconut stuff.  And instead of Rum, Gin.  And some ice.  And more gin.