Episode 12- “And You Thought The Plastinated Ones Were Skanky!”

Yesterday, we went to Body Worlds.  (We also went to Pancho Pistola’s, which, was slightly more delicious.)  You know, the one where there are dead people on display?  Like dead guy riding a horse, or dead ballet dancer?  Is it was actually really interesting, and after the first thing or so, it seems really unreal.  You stop thinking about the deadness, really.  They certainly don’t hide anything, though, that’s for sure.  (and by anything, i do mean genitals.  My brother-in-law of course gave ye olde 6th grade response of, “why are you looking?”  So, news flash, I must be a huge gay pervert because I noticed genitals on naked dead people with no skin.)(If he hadn’t said it though, I would’ve said it under my breath to entertain myself anyway.  Just like I do with “That’s what she said” %80 of the time, because my wife doesn’t think it’s funny EVERY SINGLE TIME like I do.)(That’s what she said)

Be that as it may, (for you Jim) we were looking around at the coal miner’s lung and the oro-antral fistulae, I noticed something bothersome.  There was a chick in a dress.  Like a dress dress.  To better illustrate my point, I took a picture.

It seems way less skanky in a picture, I’m sure.  But it was not very covering.  I usually have no problems with skanks, but she was very hoity-toity about the whole thing.  (the first time I’ve ever used ‘hoity-toity’.  opinions?)  I just did not understand why she would come to the museum like that.  Then, as we approached the “Exploded Body” (which, as it turns out, to my dismay, has nothing to do with Carnie Wilson), which included various body parts dangling from strings, I was witness to THIS!

PG-13, n’est-ce pas?  I did not understand why this was happening.  In front of me.  I hate when people are gross in public, especially ones in outfits non-befitting of scientific exhibitions.  As it turns out, it’s one of my things.  So consider yourselves warned, general public.  Watch your behaviour, because you never know when someone who is widely famous on the internet may defame you, ruining your reputation forever! 

Closing thought of the day:  What if Alec Baldwin’s daughter really is a bitch?  Just asking. 


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9 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. Stick people porn is so hot.

  2. Call me strange, but I’d totally rather see skanky making out than plastinated bodies. I saw Body Worlds the first time it rolled through, and I still get the willies thinking about it. Ewww. Ugh. Ewwwwwww.

  3. Okay, I saw the dress, but I missed the kissing! Ew! Who finds the dead bodies to be a turn-on? People are weird mofos.

    I thought it was weird that there were so many dead dudes, and so few dead dudettes.

    I want more Chile Rellenos now, too.

  4. I did not know this existed. im not gonna be able to eat my breakfast bar now.

    i cant acess the link…but let me understand this…naked, skinless dead people…and you can still make out the wankers?

    can you imagine that being your job? I cant.

    itd be like “hey vinnie whats on tap for today?”

    “well i gotta skin about 15 dead wankers, then carve out some vagina…”


  5. I’m truly impressed by your artistry. Now THAT should be in a museum.

  6. I would totally do the stick chick.

  7. Lol…i am in awe of you honesty. porking a dead skinless posed human is a daunting task

  8. They had that Bodies exhibit near me, but I never got to see it. But this is so much better, so it works out.

  9. I can just imagine myself dry heaving while muttering “boy that is amazing what they have done here”

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